Monday, August 18, 2014
6 Things To Help You Survive Your Spouse's Deployment
1.) Keep yourself busy.
The more you do, the quicker the time apart will pass. So hang out with your friends, start a new hobby or maybe go to the gym. It'll help you stay busy. Plus, you can surprise your husband with the changes a routine work out can make!
2.) COMMUNICATION IS KEY.
I repeat COMMUNICATION IS KEY. This is a very cliche thing to be told, but it's true. While your spouse is deployed, be sure you remain honest with each other. Keep them up to date with the things that you have going on in your life, even if you had a terrible day. It helps them feel like they're still part of the life back home. A Sergeant First Class once told my husbands unit "A soldier doesn't age on deployment. They do the same thing everyday for 9 months. Nothing changes. But the world doesn't stop back home. Life goes on and is always changing." So be sure to keep that in mind. If you don't tell your spouse things that happen while they're away, they'll learn within the first month of returning home, which can make it very overwhelming. So tell him or her that you miss them and share with them about your day, week, or month.
3.) Send each other pictures.
This simple gesture helps so much. You get to see each other throughout the months apart. One picture can make the distance seem a little less far and can bring a smile to your face, on the worst days.
4.) Don't hold in frustration or sadness.
You've probably been told "don't bother him when your angry or sad. It'll distract him from what he's doing there." This isn't true. You need to tell him when your sad, when you feel like you just can't take it anymore. And when you're angry or frustrated. If you bottle it all up because you want to "protect him," you'll end up exploding. You could take it all out on him, causing more problems than it's worth. Or maybe even your friends and family. So talk to your significant other about what's bothering you. It'll help. I promise.
5.) Remember he misses you just as much as you miss him.
This is a very important thing to remember. Sometimes the distance can take it's toll on you. It'll feel like you can't do it anymore. And sometimes, you feel like you're alone, that no one understands. That's not true. It's easy to forget that while you're apart, he misses you just as much as you miss him and that the deployment is just as hard on him, if not harder.
6.) Keep your chin up, it'll all be over soon.
You may be reading this on the first day of deployment and thinking to yourself "I still have 9 months to go. That's not soon." But if you take a moment and think about it, it really isn't that long. You want to spend the rest of your life with him right? Well 9 months seems so small, compared to 50 years. So keep your head high. Remember you're strong and you WILL make it through this.
I hope these tips help you through this deployment, or any that you may face in the future. Just stay positive. Don't worry yourself with the "what if's" or you'll drive yourself nuts.